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2.04.2010

The Pits

Although we don't want to keep lamenting her horrible illness or forcing the findable joy, there is nothing else.  There are no anecdotes to recount with pride, no sweet pictures of perfection to share.  She has a disease and, sadly, the disease has her.  The pain of her being here, the pain of the idea of her not being here, both shoot to the pit of our stomachs.  So we let the sadness visit and we cling to the treasures, we live breath by breath and laugh by laugh and tear by tear.  And we try to remember that our worst is not the worst.
JEB


3 comments:

  1. You know what guys, the hand you've been dealt is one that should never been mixed up in the cards. Considering the facts you face, I think your posts do an amazing job of balancing the absolute horridness of reality and the silver lining you MUST find in order to not lose it entirely. I never read thinking you are wallowing or sugar coating. You are sharing the ins and outs of life with terminally ill child. An unimaginable thing for so many us. And I must say you (in the words of one of Ash's former teaching colleagues) "make a fantastic chicken salad out of chicken sh*t." Please keep sharing, and allow your cyberfamily to carry some of the burden posting allows you to unload.

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  2. It is one hard card to play that you have been delt. As Beth Ann already said, you have done an amazing job of balancing reality, hope, joys and sorrow.
    Praying for you and your family, that each moment would be treasured, no act of kindness would be put off untill later and for sweet memories.
    I pray for Celia, that each of her days would be filled strength and joy.
    Love and hugs and prayers,
    Debi

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