This evening's conversation began because Tollie said he liked my shirt, said he knew that was his sister on the front, said he hated that she died. I HATE HATE HATE that she DIED, were his actual words, and I could hear his sincerity behind every syllable.
And then he said Her body died because there was trash in it, but how did the trash get there? I heard Andy start to explain that he and I both had pieces of Batten Disease in our bodies and when we each gave a piece to one of our kids, the pieces worked together to be really bad. To fill the cells with trash.
He's pretty much no nonsense when it comes to talking to the boys about how the body works.
He answers questions like What's a sperm? the same way he answers What's a heart? or What's a tissue? They laugh together about words like poop, but he reminds them that bodily functions are just that, things that bodies do to function. I mean he pretty much calls a spade a spade. Or a penis a penis.
By using real terms I think he's building a path for more questions, helping them know there's nothing they can't talk to us about, helping them know there's nothing to feel ashamed about.
So you both gave Celia bad pieces, Tollie repeated.
And yet the luck of our union amazes me again and again. I watch them listen to him and am ever more glad that I married him, that they have him for a father and I have him in my life.
I want to write more, but too many feelings are bottlenecking somewhere near my collarbone, stuck between my brain and fingertips. I'll have to ask the boys about what that could be when they get up in the morning.
The other night, after I had read Tollie a bedtime story, he explained all about the bones in his head, and how they protect his brains... I am thankful those boys have you and Andy for parents!
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