a watchful eye

Sometimes my agenda is in conflict with what is actually happening.
I try to spend more of my time paying attention, just keeping a watchful eye.

I do not feel compelled to tell all of the stories, the accidents and arguments, the misunderstandings and mistakes, but I have mentioned more than once that there are some struggles alongside all the joys. I don’t know, this is the first time I've raised three boys and this is the first time I’ve parented an eight year old and we just have some shit to figure out.
I know I can't push the boys to be something they're not, but I do want to encourage them to be more of certain things. Honest. Grateful. Confident.
I want them to grow up believing they can handle things. Not necessarily confident that they will know how to do everything, but that they can always figure it out. I want to believe that I can figure it out, too.